Eggs!


I used this photo last month, but I really like it. Anyway, Chloe left for Florida this morning (after a horrendous night during which she was running a fever and we got very little sleep). This is the first time in over a year where it’s just been Sophie, my husband and me for more than one night.

It’s nice to be able to give Sophie all of the attention. She’s clearly basking in the limelight. We played, read, ran around the house, went potty, ate a chocolate crepe …all in the two hours or so between the time I arrived home from work and her bedtime.

I can’t get over how much she’s talking. Her vocabulary, compared to Chloe at the same age, is astonishing. And she enunciates well, too. She loves pointing out shapes. Today she looked at my eyeglasses and exclaimed, “eggs!” When I realized the association she was making, I provided her with the correct terminology; however, she adamantly rejected ‘oval’ and insisted on ‘eggs.’ Fine by me. Who am I to quibble?

She also knows the names of a bunch of animals and their respective sounds. And she’s mastered the lyrics of “Alouette” and “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.” I’m looking forward to the next couple of days of relative calm. And getting reacquainted with my little Sophie.

That’s not to say I don’t miss Chloe (I called my grandmother’s house way too many times today to find out how she was doing), but I’m loving the quiet. A lot.

Bon Voyage, Chloe


Chloe is off to Florida tomorrow with my mom. Yippee! I love my daughter soooo much, but I am extremely excited (arguably too excited) to have a quiet weekend. Not that a weekend with Sophie will necessarily be quiet, but it will definitely be a lot quieter.

Chloe’s newest thing is an obsession with Ripley’s Believe it or Not. And of course, she chooses to recount the grossest anecdotes during dinner. Her favorite story is the one about the man who was born with a long tail. They cut off his tail and now he has a huge belly button on his back where the tail used to be.

Sophie’s newest favorite phrase is “Hey, guys!” It’s very funny when she says it, because she says it with great confidence and authority. After she told me she had finished her pizza, I ate her remaining portion. Of course, she went looking for it a few minutes later and when I told her I ate it, she exclaimed, “You took MY pizza!” And without missing a beat, she gave me the evil eye and stuck her tongue out at me.

Maybe Sophie should be the one going to Florida.

Where’s Sophie?

You have to look hard to find Sophie in this picture. The girls had dumped every one of their stuffed animals on the floor. They have quite the collection. This scene was actually a do-over. We were not able to memorialize the first, spontaneous episode because my husband had destroyed the camera.

I display this picture to prove a point: the girls have taken over the house. There is not a single corner that doesn’t contain a souvenir of our two little ones. I find legos, barrettes, little pocketbooks, puzzle pieces, crayons everywhere. It drives me nuts.

This morning, Chloe used Chapstick to glue two of our broken entry floor tiles together. She’s convinced she’s fixed the tiles for good. I’m glad the Chapstick is being put to good use. Because I’ve bought several of them for her over the years, and she likes them because they make her lips shiny. But they mostly just go missing after a week or two, and I’ve found plenty of them without their caps, dried out under our couch.

When Can I Start Dating?

This is crazy. Chloe asked me, for the second time in the span of a week, when she’d be able to start dating. What the f**k? It’s not that she’s in any particular rush, thank God, but what the f**k? She is seven years old.

I told her that she’d first have to live another seven years, the equivalent of the life she’s lived so far, before we’d even start to have that conversation. If I had my druthers, she’d have to live another 14 years before we even go there. But that’s not realistic. Get thee to a nunnery! Fast!

I heard on the radio today that 1/4 of all American teenage girls have STDs. That 1/2of all American girls are sexually active, and of those 40% have STDs. That’s terrifying. And sickening.

What kind of world have we brought our girls into? I have to look into chastity belts. Do they still exist? Will I need to have the “talk” with our girls when they turn 10? What the f**k!

A Mallomar Birthday

This is what happens when you have two working parents. One of them has a birthday (in this scenario, that’s Papa), and the other doesn’t get around to buying a birthday cake (that’d be me). Actually, I wasn’t working the day we were supposed to have birthday cake. I was at a Broadway show with my mom. Priorities are priorities, you know. By the way, before you start thinking that I’m a horrible wife, the play and our intended birthday celebration did not take place on his birthday, they took place the day after.

Continue reading A Mallomar Birthday

A Present for Me?

Sophie gave me her first present. A little earlier this evening, she approached me with her hands behind her back and said, “Mommy, present?” And she then revealed her hands, which contained a crumpled up piece of paper wrapped around something.

I inquired, “A present for me, Sophie?” To which my little one responded, “Yes, Mommy,” with a big grin. She ran over to me and placed the gift in my hand. I uncrumpled the paper, and inside were two shiny quarters that I had given to her a few minutes earlier.

She was very proud of herself – of her generosity. I then “rewrapped” the present, and asked her if she’d like one. To which she replied, “Yes!” And proceeded to grab the present from me.

What struck me the most about the episode wasn’t so much that she wanted to give me a present. But the fact that she took the time to crumple up some paper and wrap up the quarters…if that’s not love, I don’t know what is.

P.S. Rumor has it that Sophie climbed out of her crib a few minutes ago. This, according to my husband and Chloe who supposedly witnessed the miracle. I immediately ran upstairs, dumped Sophie back into her crib and asked her to replicate the act. She wasn’t having any of it. So, as far as I’m concerned, if I haven’t witnessed this feat personally, it hasn’t happened. When she does finally show up in our bed one morning without our assistance, then I’ll devote an entire blog entry to it. But until I see it happen with my own two eyes, I shall remain a doubting Thomas.

Home Sweet Home

I was really happy to get home this evening, after an afternoon at work that involved two minor crises – the kind of crises that bother me because because I’m still new to the job, and I want to make a favorable impression, and I don’t need people thinking I don’t do my work well. The kind of crises that stupidly cause me to apologize to people, even when there’s nothing for me to apologize about.

Continue reading Home Sweet Home

I’m Watching the Clock

On Sunday, I abandoned my husband for the afternoon to go to the theater with my mom. We saw “August: Osage County,” which was excellent. But it was a veeerrrry looonnng play. So I didn’t get home until almost 7:30 pm.

During one of the intermissions (yes, there were two of them), I called home to make sure that he bought the girls the right kind of shoes – their activity in my absence was shoe shopping. Chloe picked up the phone and she informed me that Sophie was taking her nap. I asked to speak to Papa, and she informed me that Papa was taking his nap.

Okay, I thought – not quite the Papa/daughters day I had in mind. I asked her, “What are doing?” She cheerfully replied, “I’m watching the clock.” As if this was some kind of legitimate activity, like coloring or drawing pictures or reading. I had to stifle a laugh. It turns out my dear girl was under orders from her father to wake him up in “10 minutes.”

As I continued to imagine the scene – Chloe sitting on the couch in the sunroom watching the clock on the Verizon FIOS TV box – as if it were the most normal thing in the world, I couldn’t stifle my laugh anymore. This girl can’t sit still for one minute without clamoring for someone to do something with her, yet she sounded perfectly content waiting on for time to advance when I spoke to her. Watching the clock…for crying out loud!

A Mom's Ramblings About the Marvels & Mishaps of Parenting, the Joys of Family Travel & the Writing Life